the matthew Z project

bubbler shot glass with scarf

Bubbler Tuesday.  Ah, say it with me.  Bubbler. Tuesday.  What, you say, is Bubbler Tuesday?  Bubbler Tuesday is a Tuesday; nonethesame as any other Tuesday save for it has a flared kick-ass ending to it.  Most start as any other day really.  You wake up, yawn, and then realize today is BUBBLER TUESDAY!  Then back to reality, you still have the long day ahead of you before you can even attempt to start the festivites.  Now, to some, this may thwart any possibility that the day could be good because you have to wait until after work hours to enjoy the celebration that will unleash. To others, like myself, it’s the fuel that drives me to make Tuesday great.  The illusion that nothing today will eff with me.  A reason to look at the grandieur of what tomorrow will lack in comparison to tonight. For today, will be another Bubbler Tuesday! But WHAT is it?  Simply put, it’s a celebration of me.  Not ME as in me, but to whomever is celebrating.  That ‘me’. 

It’s a get together of friends, co-workers, children, and families alike.  We congregate as if going on a shopping trip to a candy store.  The enthusiasm mounts all day until it’s time to go!  Count downs have even been witnessed. You show up at the location, which changes weekly.  Sometimes there is pizza to eat, sometimes a potluck. Other times, perhaps only snacks.  It just depends.  Greetings ensue.  Handshakes flurry, hugs give way to the break off into segmented clicks of happiness.  The women tend to assist the children on the paths of righteous clothes shedding at speeds that would challenge any racer of any kind, as they make ready the choas that will begin.  They make sure the places are ready for the blitz of traffic that will become about as normal as ordering off the dollar menu at your favorite fast food joint.  The kids, after their warmups, are set to play.  They begin a migration to happytown.  They move about the party almost unknown to most partygoers.  Except the occassional scream of ‘That’s mine!’, or just the high pitched yalp of kids in utter excitement, to have so many other kids to play with, they too enjoy this day as much as the adults.  This gives way to sounds that mimic what you would hear at a circus, or carnival. Mostly pleasant.  The men.  Well the men Read more…

I’ve decided after a long absence to try something new.  Each week I’m going to comment about something that is depicted in print, video, or commercial to be absolutely amazing, but in real life couldn’t be farther from the truth.  From fast food advertisements to models wearing jeans.  Nothing will be safe.

I’ll start this week’s new idea off with fast food.  As I was driving to work this morning I saw a billboard for a ‘trophy burger’.  It actually looked tasty.  But since I’ve given up on most fast food due to artistic differences, that being the food never looks like it is advertised and is usually more horrible than eating cardboard with salt, pepper, and ketchup, this one actually made me a bit curious.  Now all the while I’m thinking to myself, I can bet this isn’t going to live up to the presentation I want and the flavor I deserve as a paying  customer.

in print

This delightful burger starts with a third pound of  100% pure Angus beef, sure. Add some slices of cheese that actually looks like real cheese, slightly melted.  Placed between braided sesame seed buns that look like a baker just popped them out of the oven. The sesame seeds look like the hand of God placed them.  Topped with ‘fresh’ tomato, ‘real’ whole leaf lettuce, ‘crisp’ red onions and ‘crinkle-cut’ pickles. The picture leads you to believe all you have to do is sit down, roll up your sleeves, and get down to business.  And this is what I ordered…looks good doesn’t it?  My taste buds actually started to party. All that’s left is to get it and compare.

in real life

Well it isn’t the advertised piece but it isn’t too far off the mark. BUT what does it taste like? Will it be similar to the unfortunate sad, generic excuse of a burger the chain has sold for years or will it taste like a real burger? Laying my innards on the line for science I subjected myself for the good of the reader.  Although it is a step up from the economy class burger, it is hardly what I would call a premium burger.  The bun was less airy then the regular hamburger bun, but not great.  The pickles were mushy, the onions were anything but crisp.  The cheese was the usual over processed pasteurized cheese. The meat, although more ‘beefy’, was dry and similar to the highly compacted little brother burger as far as texture.  Taste?  It was a nice try, but sadly, it is far off the mark.  It left my taste buds feeling like they just encountered a chemical burn.  Salt and pepper, sure.  But this is what they put into this disaster of a burger. Read more…

You have to love traveling with kids.  They are such little explorers.

eating her Braunschweiger and crackers

drives tucker her out